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【ReachVC译文】天使投资人不会告诉你的11句话

by ReachVC桂曙光

secret (原作者Dharmesh Shah,是一个在软件行业创业多次的创业者,也是一个天使投资人。)

前一阵子网上流传2个非常有趣的PPT,一个是“VC免进”,一个是随后的“创始人免进”,我从天使投资人的角度给一些我的看法。抱歉,我没有搞成跟他们一样有很多图片那么酷,我没有那么牛逼。

天使投资人不会告诉你的11句话:

  1. 我真的愿意支持创业者 —— 不过只是那些将会帮我赚钱的;
  2. 我很担心怎样才能把你的创意解释给我老婆/老公听(她/他对任何项目都有否决权);
  3. 我持有你公司的股份实在是太少了,我不会(代表你)在我的关系圈内为公司宣传的;
  4. 我说我有些最好的朋友是做VC的,我是骗你的。即便是VC也不会成为VC的最好朋友;
  5. 我有50%的时间根本不知道你他妈的到底在讲什么东西,非虚拟货币的社会化平台是什么意思?(噢,就是一个IPhone+Facebook的支付应用);
  6. 在另外50%的时间,你自己都不知道自己在讲些什么。Term sheet里的防稀释条款跟啤酒没啥关系;
  7. 上周股票市场的情况不会真正影响我的投资决策;
  8. 我喜欢投资很酷的创业企业,因为这样可以帮我弥补高中的遗憾;
  9. 我对投资协议里的条款有一半也搞不懂,但是我敢打赌那些条款大部分都是保护我的,而不是保护你;
  10. 我说我已经在某天把支票寄给你了,其实我真的没有。我那天去打高尔夫了,我骗你了。
  11. 我做天使投资是为了寻开心,如果我想做那些没意思的工作,我早就自己创业了。

原文:

11 things an angel investor will never say

(by Dharmesh Shah, a serial software entrepreneur and angel investor.)

As a tribute to the very funny VC Non-Admissions and the follow-up Founder Non-Admissions, I offer to you my own take on this - from an angel investor perspective.  Sorry that mine aren't in a cool presentation form with pictures and such.  I don't have that kind of talent.

10 Things An Angel Investor Will Never Say

  1. I really want to support entrepreneurs - but just those that are going to make me money.
  2. I dread having to explain your business idea to my spouse (who can veto any deal).
  3. I don't really have enough stake in your company to spam my network on your behalf.
  4. I was lying when I said that some of my best friends were VCs.  Even VCs aren't best friends with VCs.
  5. I have no idea what the hell you're talking about 50 percent of the time.  What's a socially-semantic mobile platform for non-virtual currency mean?  (Oh, it's an iPhone/Facebook payment app).
  6. The other 50 percent of the time, you have no idea what you're talking about.  Anti-dilution provisions in a termsheet are not about beer.
  7. How the public market did last week does impact my decision-making.
  8. I like to invest in cool startups because it helps make up for high school.
  9. I don't understand what half the things in the funding agreement mean either, but I'm betting that most of them are to protect me, not you.
  10. I really didn't put the check in the mail the day I said I did.  I was golfing that day.  I sucked.
  11. I'm in it to mostly have fun.  If I wanted to do unpleasant work, I'd have my own startup.

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